Today I woke up in desperate need of Jesus. As I spent my time with Him, He took a scripture I have read many times in my life and totally transformed it for me. I saw myself in the story. And I wonder if you might see yourself in it too.
I am not a literal widow, but I see myself in this widow’s story. This widow has inspired me. She has shown me that even in poverty, weakness, disease, grief, insecurity and all the enslaving fears and battles we humans fight, God just wants us as we are.
Mark 12: 41-44
“And he sat down opposite the treasury and watched the people putting money into the offering box. Many rich people put in large sums. And a poor widow came and put in two small copper coins, which makes a penny. And he called his disciples to him and said to them.
Truly, I say to you, this poor widow has put in more than all those who are contributing to the offering box. For they all contributed out of their abundance, but she out of her poverty has put in everything she had, all she had to live on.”
We have more worth in His eyes than we could ever know.
He just wants us. He wants our love and the little or much we have to give. He can use it all. God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong (1 Corinthians 1:27). There is no amount of clean up, or education, or offering, or works of this world that can make Jesus love you or me anymore.
None of the outside pursuits of life make us any more worthy than we are at this very moment. He chose to take our place and pay the penalty for the sin we all live in, for the sin we can’t begin to pay for. He felt every pain, physical, emotional, and otherwise.
He felt bondage and grief and the sorrow of the entire world on his body. When he was nailed to the cross, He had you on his mind. He had love overflowing from his heart. He stepped in to be your advocate, to release you from shame, from bondage, from addiction, from sin.
Over the years I have deeply struggled with knowing my worth.
I have beat myself up. I never feel good enough, I never think I did enough, I feel I come in short. This has only magnified in recent years of living with debilitating disease every single day. When I compare myself to healthy people, I do come in short…. every time. A few days ago I watched a sermon where the pastor shared an analogy that opened my eyes and allowed me a glimpse of the way God sees you and me. The guy went on to share a story of when your first child starts to walk. When they first wobble and bounce around to try and take that first step, they can either put out their foot and walk successfully or fall flat on their face. But when they put that first step in front of the other and go for another 2 or 3 steps, even the most calloused human can find joy and celebration in watching their child learn to walk for the first time. We as humans and parents, see them fall over and over again but we cheer and are genuinely thrilled at every single victory, no matter how small. Even if it’s one step.
Beloved, this is the way God sees us.
He is celebrating with even the smallest victories. He is cherishing even the smallest offerings. He is moving mountains with the smallest faith of a mustard seed.
So no matter what you have to bring. No matter the small steps you might have to take. God loves you with a deep unrelenting love and He is celebrating with you.
My aim and my hope are that we will release ourselves from trying to do what Jesus did on the cross. Trying to make ourselves better and somehow work our way to worth. I, in my sickness and suffering, can love Jesus and people. You, in whatever your circumstances are, can do the same in your own way.
Just never underestimate what you have to bring and the way Jesus sees you. You have never been and never will be more adored or cherished than you are in this exact moment.